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Messages - Km Anu

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Lounge / Re: Poetry
« on: May 06, 2020, 01:39:59 pm »
I really like Cassilda's Song, I use it as an invocation nowadays. Sometimes I add my own expansions and whatnot, so here is one. I'll call it Khemem's song.

Hastor’s light may graze the sea,
A thread of dread that carries me,
Through the night,
Into Carcosa.

Evening brings a giddy dread,
Where shadows stretch from in my head,
The mind doth reach,
Cold Carcosa.

Dew drops stain the widow’s breast,
Glowing red across her dress,
Yet pay no mind,
In Carcosa.

A creature calls out in the night,
Robbed of fear his wings take flight,
But never stray,
Into Carcosa.

Still mist splatters on the rocks,
And both suns rise up from the loch,
Oh blackest dawn,
Rise Carcosa.

Lounge / Re: Poetry
« on: April 30, 2020, 04:54:08 am »
I walk along this path in day, and rest upon it in the night.
I let the weight of lidded light bathe me the calm of sight.
The water falls in early day, I tilt my head to wash away,
The fires of the heated tongues, the sounds of soothing settle numb,
Upon my ears and still I try to fight them off with sticks and knives,
Their jagged edges pierce and stab but in the eve I find my niche.
Each day a new, each morn reborn.
I’m stronger now than those who fight,
I’m wiser now than those who bleed,
Upon my path I’m met with strife, and still I walk through quietly.
The wisdom whispers at my ears and I would drink their solemn sounds,
I press my hands into the sky, and push my base down to the ground.
At long last a journey done, and in it I have called my calm.
I see in me not longingly, A stronger being in the dawn.

Current Events / Re: How are some of you handling this Corona thing
« on: April 30, 2020, 04:29:55 am »
Socializing in 2020

Introductions / Re: Como Emagrecer Rápido Dicas Das Melhores Jeitos
« on: April 30, 2020, 04:25:22 am »

Introductions / Re: Volumao
« on: April 30, 2020, 04:24:14 am »
You must purchase official xtragel in up to 12x on the card through the official website and accept product in your home in A DISCRETE PACKAGE.

Can we please get rid of these people . . .

Yeah, I tried to alert the founders with the report function but haven't heard back yet. I'll try posting in the member board.

Lounge / Re: What are you doing right now?
« on: April 24, 2020, 02:36:26 pm »
Lately I'm learning that it's my primary language.

Lounge / Re: What are you doing right now?
« on: April 23, 2020, 10:11:42 am »
Drawing :/

I've been trying to touch up my skills with physical mediums. I've been doing a lot of digital work lately.

Lounge / Re: Poetry
« on: April 23, 2020, 10:06:33 am »
Along the shore the cloud waves break,
The twin suns sink behind the lake,
The shadows lengthen
In Carcosa

Strange is the night where black stars rise,
And strange moons circle through the skies,
But stranger still is
Lost Carcosa

Songs that the Hyades shall sing,
Where flap the tatters of the King,
Must die unheard in
Dim Carcosa.

Song of my soul, my voice is dead,
Die though, unsung, as tears unshed
Shall dry and die in
Lost Carcosa

-Cassilda's Song in "The King in Yellow" (Act 1, Scene 2), Robert W. Chambers, 1895

Journals / Re: The Anthology of Km Anu
« on: April 22, 2020, 02:37:33 pm »
I've been really into Zdzisław Beksiński these last two weeks, and I've got a heap of un-used supplies from the failed Lupercalia event (thanks co-organizers) so I ordered a standing easel and plan to start re-discovering paint ASAP. It's strange, I haven't done art through a....physical? tactile? medium since highschool outside of sketching. The return feels nice and natural, a good break while I process all the shit from Voidism. I really wish that system didn't seem like such an insurmountable dread.

Things are great otherwise. I'm still working at the hospital, and no one in our houshold has gotten sick. In fact, the pandemic isn't so bad up here at all. Unfortunately, I'm fighting with my spouse alot. I'm pretty sure you could describe the dynamic as emotional abuse. She's very controlling. I've been hoping it's a reaction to stress and not a forever thing. I'm almost certain that this kind of relational bullying when employed against me of all people serves only to torture the abuser. I'm not an easy target. But things are fine for now.

I wish there was more I could do here with the OS. Everyone seems....more distant than usual. Perhaps I can host a zoom meeting or something. I'm not sure if anyone would attend, but it would stir up the community and get discussion flowing regularly, something I'm sure none of us would object to. We'll see.


Access to memory is used to recall previous similar instances and may have relevant ties to access mechanisms defined in the field of machine learning. As of now, we can observe that short term memory is accessed in similar functions of data retrieval, while long term memory relies on situational cues, both internal and external. Most manifestations result in biased memory unless the user has an established form of emotional control. Furthermore, the effect of emotion is minimized to nearly un-detectable capacity while retaining or even improving its core function if the user has acquired methods of thought transmutation, banishment, free expression, coping, ect.

Emotional states also relay the cost value of predictive models by punishing the user for non-beneficial action (self motivated or otherwise.) Unless the user can acknowledge the cost value and adjust the model appropriately (take responsibility for and acknowledge their contribution to the perception of stress) malignant action or thought remains beneficial in the mind of the user, contrasting the reality of their actions. By taking responsibility for perceived error we are able to identify thoughts and action that contribute to the perceived failure and adjust them for later re-testing.

Focused attention determines resources spent on each predictive model in relation the to the value of success. This is how we plot courses of action in accordance with desire, or form desire all together. If the information is being considered to fill a need, focused attention determines the perception of that need's urgency.

Journals / Re: The Anthology of Km Anu
« on: April 15, 2020, 09:39:49 am »
“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world: the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.” ― George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman

Artemism / Re: Question: Sex/gender in Artemism, clarification?
« on: April 14, 2020, 01:46:14 pm »
Esoteric gender. Gross.

I just use Male=Force stuff in, Female= Take it in/ grow it/ birth it. Seed and soil is more fitting tbh. There is so much that CAN be said, but most of the time it doesn't get more simple than that.

Thelema / Scientific Illuminism
« on: April 14, 2020, 06:21:19 am »
Ave All,

 While getting my ducks in a row for an ordination program, I realized that a personal ethos to define my esoteric tradition as a "Truth finding," system is cumbersome. The program's director made a comment stating that a "Thelemic Black Magician," that aligns their beliefs with Scientific Illuminism should fit just fine, but went on to confess that they aren't familiar with the Thelemic system. Neither am I.

In my research I came across a book called "Naturalistic Occultism: An Introduction to Scientific Illuminism," but I'm still reading The Better Angels of our Nature, The Revolt of Angels, and Speak of the Devil (At the same fucking time unfortunately) and I don't have the time or energy to take on a fourth. I tried to find some YouTube videos outlining the core concepts, but most of what I found were lectures loosely defining a system of "Magical science," that reminded me of the testing methods employed by the IOT with a more focused theorem. Unfortunately the lectures were 20+ minutes of armature teaching, and I don't have time like that.

I was wondering if anyone with eyes on this board could provide resources or a quick overview of the core concepts and how it differs from techniques used in other non-theistic traditions. I don't like mixing science and magic, especially when speaking to mundanes or new Satanists. Hopefully these methods will give a respectable form to magic's practice & exploration without pulling the pseudo-science mix-up we see in many new-age movements.

Entertainment / Re: Rare TOS ceremony footage
« on: April 14, 2020, 06:03:03 am »
ToS is mentioned in a buch of Satanic Panic documentaries from the 80's too. Its almost funny the things said about them.

I think this is TC's only presence on youtube.

Great video though, and his book was pretty good.

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